PATRICIA WEBER AKA THE NIBBLER,
First, I would like to apologize for my use of the word sex in my last column about shower sex. I was referring to penis-in-vagina (PIV) sex when I was talking about how it is difficult to have sex in the shower. It is conventional to use sex to refer to PIV sex, but since this has caused confusion, I will no longer be doing that and will be specific when using the word sex.
I am a first year and I live in a double. I have been seeing a couple of people on campus throughout the year and we are sexually active. I am unsure how to get my roommate out of my room nicely and I do not know if I need to be considerate when it comes to neighbors. Do you have any tips for dorm sex?
Thank you, Double Trouble
Dear Double Trouble,
I used to live in a triple my first semester at Beloit and it was hard enough trying to arrange to have one person out of the room, let alone two! Let me give me some simple dorm sex etiquette that every Beloiter should know:
1. RESPECT! Do not sexile your roommate(s) if they have to study, already have people over, already reserved the room for alone time (for themselves or with a partner[s]), are sick, if they told you already that they do not like being sexiled, or anything reasonable.
2. If you must sexile, talk to your roommate(s) ahead of time to have the room to yourselves. Last minute hook up? Send them a text or call or just simply ask up front to their face if you can have the room for a few hours. Lock the door, unless they request to leave it unlocked because they forgot their key or something. Do your thing and then unlock the door and send your roommate a text or call saying you done and it is safe to come back into the room.
3. Add sexile to your roommate agreement as soon as possible. And sexile does not have to be you having sex with others—it can include masturbation as well.
4. Leave a marker on the door like a tie or a fun “sexy time” sign just in case you are unable to reach your roommate or if your friends drop by to say hello.
5. Be considerate to your neighbors. Do not be a screamer at 1 a.m. on a Tuesday night when there are classes the next day. Be considerate.
6. RESPECT! It is so important I feel the need to say it twice.
If anyone has anything to add this list, has questions about anything else, or just want to say hello, email: email@example.com or drop a note: Box #1717