By Sasha Debevec-McKenney and Ian Hedges
OPINIONS EDITOR AND POLITICAL COLUMNIST
1. Leo DiCaprio in a dress. Crying. It’s hotter than it sounds.
2. Gay sassy-ﬁght, followed by a gay-kiss. Not as hot as it sounds, but still, crossing some boundaries, which is exciting.
3. Judi Dench. Girl can act. She can act so well, we almost believed that J. Edgar’s entire personality was based on a freakish obsession with making her happy. (The rest of the cast can act, too—it almost made up for the sh*tty plot.)
4. It got better reviews than “Jack and Jill” (which is still holdin’ strong with three percent on Rotten Tomatoes vs. “J. Edgar’s” 41 percent).
5. Even if you don’t care about the FBI and its erstwhile leader, the movie spends a suspicious amount of time dealing with the mystery of who kidnapped the Lindbergh baby.
1. The “old” makeup (especially on J. Edgar’s gay lover) was so bad it was distracting. In the later scenes when you’re supposed to feel an emotional connection, the only thing you can concentrate on is the weird putty substance dripping oﬀ their faces.
2. The actor who plays Bobby Kennedy stayed too true to Bobby Kennedy. Of all the things in the movie to make historically accurate, why the world’s most grating accent?
3. Was J. Edgar Hoover really that much of an *sshole? Maybe. But was he such an *sshole that he would expect somebody to be at work the day after having a stroke?
4. On the real though, the plot didn’t make sense. What time period are we in? Should there be horses or should there be cars?
5. They build up and build up to J. Edgar Hoover’s meeting with FDR and then DON’T show FDR. These die-hard Rooseveltians were sorely disappointed.