By Joy Belamarich
Recently I’ve been hooking up
with this guy. He’s super hot and
has moves in bed, but sometimes
when he’s drunk, he says that the
reason he can’t get it up is because
of my bush. I know I keep it
trimmed down there, but this is
really making me self-conscious.
Should I really shave so he can get
it up? Help!
Bashful about Becoming Bald
Girl, that guy sounds like a turd.
You deserve better! Jesus lord, a
scrawny chipmunk deserves better!
I hope you stopped and asked him
to wax his hairy ass since it was
really distracting you and keeping
you dry as a desert. I am tempted
to get his name so I can leave a fat
clump of pubes in his mailbox.
But to answer your question,
chances are, arriving at his door
Saturday night with your private
parts as pink and bare as a baby’s
bottom won’t do the trick for his,
err, erectile deﬁciency. However,
if you are still curious about the
whole experience of being bare-
down-there, the great news is that
hair grows back, usually with twice
as much gusto as before, so if you
want to go for it and try it, all the
power to you.
If it makes you feel sexy and
conﬁdent, then that’s great. Just do
it for you, not the lame judgmental
girls in high school that stared you
down in the locker room, or the
porn stars that have little vagina-
slits, and deﬁnitely not the drunk
hairy-ass turd (sorry for assuming
that he has a hairy ass, it’s just how
I picture him).
Unfortunately, shaving has just
become a part of our generation,
but who knows, by the time our
daughters are teenagers, the sexy
thing might be putting your pubic
hair in little braids. Good luck!