By Kate Finman
“And you may now kiss your bride.” Even if you’ve never actually been to a wedding, you’re probably familiar with those words. The bride and groom kiss, and it’s cute and happy, more of a tradition than anything special. By this point, most people have done a lot more than kiss before they walk down the aisle. Last week, I was privileged to go to a wedding for dear friends who kissed for the first time after being pronounced husband and wife. Isaac and Kelsey Roberts met a little over a year ago, growing together as their relationship moved forward. They hugged and held hands and said I love you, but they saved everything else for the wedding night. It was obvious they were in love, and they were certainly attracted enough to each other to want to kiss before the I do’s. So what stopped them?
Both Kelsey and Isaac are committed followers of Jesus Christ and have put their lives completely under His Lordship. They want God to be glorified in every single aspect of their relationship. Now, the Bible doesn’t say anything about not kissing before marriage, but it is pretty clear about sex: it’s for marriage. But kissing?
There have been studies that show that when you kiss, chemicals are released that make you want to have sex. If you don’t want to have sex before you get married, you shouldn’t put yourself in a situation or state that would hinder that value. You need to stay as far away from the temptation as possible. And for some people, that means not kissing.
That’s the science, but there’s more. Think about your first kiss. Do you even know that person any more? Do you remember that day? Kelsey and Isaac will always remember that they kissed for the first time on April 14, 2011, because it was a truly marvelous and beautiful day. Their closest friends and family were able to share in the moment, and it was captured on film and in photos for the years to come.
Living here, in the midst of a casual sex, hookup, friends with benefits, have sex with someone you’ve known for a month kind of environment, I experienced a breath of air from this wedding, but also a confirmation. You see, I want the same thing: for my husband and I to kiss for the first time on our wedding day. You really think I get encouragement for that here at Beloit? Everyone I’ve talked to thus far has been so struck with disbelief that people would ever do this. But as I replay the day over in my mind, I am so blown away by their submission to each other and God, and the Lord’s faithfulness towards them and all of His people.
A wedding is an important day for people who choose it. But in sharing that first taste of intimacy together, the day became completely inspired.